WeeklySA_AdminSELFLESS: Newly released book Love and Other Letters to My White Mother revisits the unbreakable bond between a black child and her white foster mother…
By Thuli Zungu
Author Choene Susan Selepe’s unexpected debut book is dedicated to a white woman who changed her life forever. It is a passionate and deeply moving tribute reflecting on nostalgic letters that reveal a poignant story of extraordinary bond crossing the race, class and divide.
Using the intimate medium of letters, this memoir pays testament to the life and legacy of Genie McLachlan, a white mother who selflessly transformed the life of a young black girl from the impoverished Limpopo village of Morale HaKibi by informally fostering the sweet young child.
The story starts with the duo’s first meeting at the time when Selepe is only 11-years-old on the foot of the Blouberg Mountains, in Limpopo. They meet this way because the young Selepe and her group of young friends who have been loyal spectators to mountain hikers, are today close enough for McLachlan to notice that one of her young fans, Selepe, has a covered hand wound.
McLachlan immediately offers to clean and plaster the wound while asking some idle questions which the young girl answers innocently not knowing they are shifting something in the white mother. For starters the wound is the result of an adult’s angst after the young girl allowed her attention to wander as they prepared something to cook on the outside hearth.
What follows is a relationship that continues in an organic nature that manages to stand the test of time in the eye of a raging apartheid blaze which made sure no such noble acts went unpunished. On the other hand, this motion story takes place against a gloomy picture that the author describes in detail: the village’s struggles of poverty and deprivation.
If she had not been sold to McLachlan’s heart of gold, Selepe imagines that her life would have followed the trajectory of many of her peers; little education, small town mentality and marriage to a local man with a meagre salary or worse.
McLachlan, although she had her own family, with a special needs son, extended a kindness towards her black foster child by weaving her into the fabric of her own household in Parktown, Johannesburg.
Selepe’s entire life; education, clothes and food were all donations she received from McLachlan, who without a shred of paper in respect of this arrangement, kept her end of the stick through and through.
What is commendable is that all the McLachlan’s loved this idea and did not stand in the way of their mother and foster sister’s wishes. These letters give a clear account of the moments of grace and generosity that formed her journey-from the struggles of a village child to the glories of an Arts degree, wife, and mother.
“I started writing Love and other Letters to My White Mother on the 8th of January 2023 because the New Year marked 35 years since we had met. I told myself I would write 35 letters to honour and celebrate Genie’s love towards me. To appreciate her no holds-barred humanity,” says Selepe, who says she also wondered if the time was ripe for this release.
“It took four months to write the manuscript and then another four months going through the publishing stages.”
Selepe’s prose in these letters is unflinchingly honest yet tenderly rendered, a reflection of her deep gratitude and love for McLachlan. The book is something more than a personal testimony to how even small actions of kindness can ripple through generations, creating legacies that inspire. It calls on readers to reflect upon those who shaped their paths and to honour their unsung heroes who believed in them when nobody else did.
The author says that the success of the book for her will be more conversations initiated about fostering and adoption on whatever scale because for her, this was an African way of life dating centuries back. As I read this book, I could not help being transported back to a time of the beginning of this story and wondered about the exquisite fabric that the likes of McLachlan are cut from.
By the mere existence of this relationship, the woman risked her own life and that of her children. It also brings to the surface the question of how much ubuntu us blacks still practice when there are so many haves who will not even consider fostering a child.
By Selepe’s own account, McLachlan was not a wealthy woman or a political activist, but she managed to tear down the walls of incredulous divides
The author painfully singles out Chapter 18 as her favourite. “Letter 18 is close to my heart. I studied keeping my biological mother on my mind. She was the only person whose situation I wanted to change. She was hard-pressed with difficulties, and I had faith that since I was out of trouble, thanks to my white mother, I would put all efforts into my studies, complete in record time, go look for a job and support her.”
The book is a required reading for anyone who loves stories about the best stories of humanity. It gives the reader a rare insight into the socio-cultural complexities of South Africa and reminds us that across divides, the deepest of them all, love and kindness can try to breach them all.
This is not a eulogy to Genie McLachlan but rather a call to give flowers to the people in our lives who touch us while they can still smell the flowers.
A poignant, inspiring read that lingers long after the final letter is read. Highly recommended.
* Love and other Letters to my White Mother-Reach Publishers retails at R199
