WeeklySA_AdminCON: Victim too embarrassed to report to police the sweet-talking stranger who knelt down in public while begging for her number…
By Robert Tlapu
Xoli Sibanda (not her real name) was going through a lot when she met his ‘prince charming’ who made her feel like a queen of queens. She was well taken care of, she lived a life every woman would envy. Her life changed from heartache, stress, loneliness to a life full of life and life worth living.
Xoli met her prince charming in the early morning hours of 23 July 2022 at the local filling station in Polokwane. “I had popped in to the filling station shop to buy something for breakfast as I was on my way to work. It was in the morning between 7:30 and 7:50. As I walked back to the car, I saw a gentleman walking out of the shop as well. I didn’t pay much attention, as you know it tends to gets busy at filling stations around that time, as most people are rushing to work, schools and pop in to buy this and that”.
“As I was walking towards the car, he greeted me and I responded. He then asked for my number, and naturally I refused to give it to him, he begged and even kneeled down which eventually made me to give it to him because he was causing a scene that drew attention of other people around. ” a mother of two told WSAM.
Then the lines of communication began between Xoli and her ‘prince charming’ who introduced himself as Robert Kiizer, who Xoli says he is of Ugandian origin. Robert told Xoli that he was a mechanical engineer working at the Anglo Platinum mine in Polokwane after being transferred from the Rustenburg branch.
“He told me he moved to Polokwane two months ago. He said he had two kids who were staying with their mother (his ex) back home in Uganda. When we met, he was driving a white Ranger bakkie, which was still new with no registration plates and told me the mine had just bought him the vehicle, so he can use it to travel around for work related matters, and not use his personal cars which were Golf 7R and Range Rover,” said Xoli.
According to Xoli, she couldn’t resist Robert as he was too good with his sweet words. “Then we started dating and his ways and strategies were too good to be true, but I couldn’t say no to him, he had a way to sweep me off my feet”.
Xoli says whenever they went out for dinner or lunch, they would never go to any other restaurant. “We would only dine at top classy, sophisticated restaurants like Fusion Botique Saskia, Uhuru Lifestyle, Ashas Lifestyle, and Ambiance Nguni Grill. These are very private restaurants and not many people go to this kind of restaurants. I only realized later that he preferred private restaurants because he didn’t want to be seen by people he was still planning to scam”.
According to Xoli, Robert’s luxury lifestyle seemed to suite his ‘position at the mine’ very well. He would always tell her that machines had broken down at the mines, and would receive calls from fellow ‘mine workers’ and explain to them what to do and would always complain that his colleagues don’t understand what he was telling, and would say it is better he go there personally.
“Then he would disappear for 4 to 8 hours, and I couldn’t get hold of him on the phone. When he gets back, he would tell me that he was underground, where there is no network hence the phone was off”.
“With my kind of line of work, he knew for sure that my schedule is always tight, then he would insist that I come to his ‘workplace’ so he can introduce me to his colleagues and friends, and to see his ‘workplace’ as well so he can make be relaxed in the relationship”.
As the relationship gained momentum, invites for sleep overs began to flood in. “The first time I slept over at his house was on the 18 September 2022. He was staying at house number 4493, Thornhill Estate in Fairview. He suggested to me that I move in with my kids, so that we can live together under one roof, to avoid the to and fro between my house and his house. I then declined the offer, citing that it was too soon”.
Tables started to turn when one day Xoli noticed his weird and strange behaviour. “He told me that his job is stressing him, and it wasn’t fair for him for a mere monthly salary of R100k. He told me that he is considering to resign and buy trucks, hire them out to the mines as they can make him an income of R500k per month with his own driver, the option was the R400k per month with the driver from the mine. To me it was a very good and viable plan for us” reminisced Xoli.
Xoli added that the Ranger bakkie disappeared and Robert told her he had sold it for R350k, and he has R211k on his savings. “He further told me that his friend who would be introducing him to the business of trucks was prepared to borrow him R600k, then he would repay him as soon as he start making money from the trucking business”.
Xoli said Robert used to come back home with hard cash, as he was trying to raise the R 1.5 million that the people who want to help him tender for the trucks in the mines demanded. “He brought lots of money home, hard cash and we would count it. And the next day he went to the bank to cash out his savings. He said those people wanted to deal with hard cash only, as they are avoiding any paper traces. He started to blackmail me and pressurising me to get a loan, to add the money we had to make a total of R1.5 million”.
“I withdrew the R50k savings I had and applied for R150k loan. A bank consultant asked me why do I need hard cash and not do a transfer the money, and told them I needed cash as I am paying builders and they do not have bank accounts as they are foreigners. He was waiting at the mall parking, and I gave him the R200k cash. He then left and few minutes later he phoned me telling me he is driving to Pretoria to deliver the money to the tender guys. Immediately I came back to my senses, and I phoned someone at the traffic department to check Robert’s car registration number for me. The person told me the car registration number doesn’t exist. That was a confirmation of my instincts that Robert might be a scammer, but for some strange reason I didn’t trust them enough because he was such a nice person that every woman would need”.
Xoli continued that Robert kept phoning her to update her about the meeting with the tender contacts, and as it was getting late he would sleep over in Pretoria and drive back to Polokwane the following morning. “He even phoned at night before we slept to inform me that he met with the tender contacts and everything is in order. The next morning he phoned again and told me about our ‘dream life’ once the tender deal is through. And that was the last time I spoke to him. I kept phoning and sending Whatsapp texts few days later, and it kept ringing and texts were not read. I believe he threw away the phone so he wouldn’t be traced”.
Xoli says her life has changed since the day she gave Robert the R200k, she is paying back R5 000 loan monthly for the next 5 years. She says though she has lost a lot of money, she is still grateful that at least she didn’t get killed, as some people do not get lucky enough to make it out alive.
“The most painful thing is God showed me all the signs but I continued to do what I was not supposed to do. I gave this guy money knowing that the cars he was driving do not exist in South African car registrations system.
Xoli revealed to WSAM that according to Robert passport, he was born 05 May 1978. “Then since he was living in a secured estate, he suggested that I should give him my certified copy of my ID so he can arrange that my fingerprint is registered to gain access into the estate. Now my worry is, I don’t know if he needed a copy of my ID for the fingerprints purposes or he had other scamming intentions about it” said the worried 43 year Xoli.
Xoli said she went to Thornhill to look for him and when I got to the gate the security personnel told her that she was not the only woman looking for him, there were other women looking for him as well. Robert had relocated to another area. Xoli believes that Robert was using something on her not to think straight. “What happened to me is really killing me inside, I might be smiling but my inner self is hurt and broken; I am traumatised but just glad to be alive,” concluded Xoli.
Contrary to Xoli heartbreaking story, there are people who have found joy and good life from online dating.
‘LOVE IS IN AIR – THANKS TO FACEBOOK’
A woman who reached out to WSAM after the publication carried a report on online date scams, claimed she had found only true love through online dating. Preferring to be referred only as “Sister Yvonne”, she said she met her beau of 10 years through Facebook – and that her love life has never been happier. Before then, she had encountered a lot of scammers who tried to rip her off, but never succeeded. She cited desperation and loneliness as the key factors driving women into the arms of scammers.
“Be friends first for some time. Communicate on a friend only level first. If they keep mentioning God fearing and God this and that, they are scammers. I met my partner on Facebook 10 years ago, we communicated for many months before we met in person. He never asked me for money and I never asked anything like that too. Scammers usually ask for something from you fast,” warned Sister Yvonne.
*NEXT WEEK, A PSYCHOLOGIST SHARES VALUABLE TIPS ON ONLINE DATING
Published on the 92nd Edition.
